About (this blog is no longer current)

I no longer update this blog. There is another here.

We are a lesbian couple who started out living in Bangkok. We are Thai/ British and in our mid 30s. Ths blog is about our decision to become mothers and our journey on the way there. We are now mothers of healthy twin girls (born 21.12.12), and left Thailand on a long winded and unfairly challenging journey. We wanted to move to the UK where I am from) but were prevented by the overtly stringent Spouse Visa Rules. However, happily this led to our move to Prague in the Czech Republic – a city which has welcomed us with open arms and will always hold a special spot in my heart now.

There were two reasons for writing this blog; (1) to offer support, and receive it from other women in similar situations, having trouble with conception; (2) to comment on our specific situation: We are in a fairly unique position. In London, lesbians are having children all over the place and have been doing so for years. But in Bangkok…? In Prague? I do still have some contacts in Thailand, but they are dwindling, and my usefulness in this area is dwindling. Sadly, all I can reliably state is what is no longer allowed…

There are a lot of Tom-dee Thai-Thai couples who are helping one another with one womanโ€™s (usually the Deeโ€™s) children from a previous relationship (they do not have the option as Thai citizens to create their own children!). In my former workplace there was another AI baby between two mums (Farang-Farang parents), and a lot of mixed Thai Farang hetero relationships with children. We were the first couple I know of in BKK to be gay, Thai Farang AND planning an AI baby. Others in a similar situation to ours might find this blog interesting and formerly, useful ๐Ÿ˜ฆ . 

At least we spread the message that it was possible in this lovely but deeply conservative society, and may be again. 

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38 comments

  1. Hello!!! I love your blog and keeping up with your journey so I’ve given you a Liebster Blog Award!!!

    1. Hiya! We are so happy to have received this award!! Lovely! I love your blog too! ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. i love Bangkok 2
    hope you 2 have a wonderful baby
    please post more picture around the city
    and thanks for visiting my site

    1. I love your site! Sorry I didn’t reply to this sooner. where are you based?

      1. I’m living in Hong Kong now

  3. I tagged you in a post so that I can learn more about you ๐Ÿ™‚ http://futurefords.wordpress.com/2012/04/08/11-questions/

    1. I will get onto this soon – promise! ๐Ÿ™‚
      (how do you tag people?)

  4. No worries :” To tag people just list their blog name and make it link back to their blog page. Hope that helps!

  5. So glad I ran across your blog. My husband and I are a Thai-Farang gay male couple and are exploring the options to start our own family here in Thailand. Certainly glad to see other folks blazing that trail. Will follow with interest!

    1. Wow, great to hear!! Thailand presents surprising difficulties for gay /lesbian couples, given their social visibility… I’d love to keep up with your progress too. A few other lesbian couples are now using our doctor, but you are the only other gay thai-farang couple I know of who is looking to start a family. Nice to ‘meet’ you!

  6. Hi! I have awarded your blog with the “One Lovely Blog” award. Check it out here: http://jusmeh.wordpress.com/2012/05/06/oooooh-a-gold-star/

  7. Vivien · · Reply

    Hi roxx

    My partner and i were also looking for a doctor in bangkok to start our family. However, it is always a dead end for us. After chancing upon your site, there seems to a light. Can you please kindly email us to help and advise us?

    My email address is mizunoami82@hotmail.com.

    Sincerely awaiting your advise.

    1. Yes, I’d be delighted to help!

  8. Vivien · · Reply

    maybe you add me on msn? we can communicate better there… mizunoami82@hotmail.com

    1. I’m sorry I don’t have it but I just emailed you. ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. Kelly · · Reply

    Hi! Some googling lead me to your blog. My wife and I are expecting our first child in BKK in February. I will be 6 weeks tomorrow. Looking forward to your future blog entries!

    1. Oooh! How exciting! I’d like to collate some details about your ‘journey’ in the interests of creating a source for ‘people like us’. Maybe you’d like to meet up and be gay pregnancy buddies? Maybe I’m just a bit over excited!

  10. Hi! I met you and A briefly some time ago at a Vibe (?) party and have recently discovered your blog. How cool! I was so excited for the two of you when I read you had finally gotten pregnant after so many disappointments. Anyway, I recently started blogging myself wanted to let you know I and made mention of your blog in my latest post : )

    1. Thanks for the shout out! Just disappointed that I appear in my mid 30s, I need to get some Botox, perhaps? Or eat more greens? Hope you enjoy the blog, I certainly feel about 10 years older since TTC /getting pregnant. Sigh! ๐Ÿ˜‰

      1. Lol…I’m sorry if I got your age wrong. It’s been a long time. I was basing that guess more on your level of maturity/stage of life than anything else : )

      2. Ah, that’s sweet of you to say- I don’t mind! ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. Hey There!! The hubster has been tapped on the shoulder for a job in Bangkok!! As an expat, what are the things you would advise and/or recommend that we consider before uplifting our lives there!!

    1. Hmmm. That’s a tough one. Depends what you like! There are some very informative websites- one called bangkokstickman and there is a forum run by a guy called “george thaivisa”. Try googling them or hitting me up with some specific things you want to know about.
      I think you’d like it here ๐Ÿ™‚

  12. Hi! I see you and your partner have been successful and at this time the baby might already be out. How are things so far? In addition to IUI or IVF, my partner and I will also be needing a donor. Do you by any chance know if any of the clinics in Thailand has a sperm bank open to single women?If so, any idea on the costs? At this point, the country we’re based at only caters to married couples and this is the challenge we’ve been having so far. Looking forward to your advise. Thank you!

    1. Yes, our clinic! And at least one more!

  13. Oh that’s nice… is it possible to get the details your clinic please, and others you are aware about? Thank you…

    1. Can you pass me your email and I’ll send you lots of info! ๐Ÿ™‚

  14. Sorry about that, I thought you can see it as I was requested to put it in. ๐Ÿ™‚ Please send it at neo2874_kawaii@yahoo.com.

  15. Thanks for visiting my blog. I know you will be brilliant mummies. I can appreciate that it is daunting to be pioneers in Bangkok. I wish all three of you the very best. ~ Dennis

  16. Hi there, are you still in Bangkok? It’d be good to touch base with you as we’ve just received news from our clinic that they can no longer provide us with their service. They’ve said it’s because we’re ‘single’. I also think it’s because we are in a same sex relationship, however, they’re being polite. We’re devastated and desperately seeking information re where to from here. We both live and work in Bangkok. Our email is lizrobaby@gmail.com

    1. Hi Lizro – I sent you an email. xxx

  17. So glad to found you guys. I’m planning for an IUI this June after long consideration. I’m planning to do it in Thailand too cos I speak the language and have family there. Can you recommend the clinic that you go to? How long do I have to remain in Bangkok cos I’m actually working overseas. I could take long leave.

    1. Hi! You won’t find it so easy now, I fear. Can you send me an email?

  18. Hi. Your story is inspirational. My partner and I are interested in starting a family too. Can you send me the details of your clinic?

    You can email me at: hot_chick_ako@yahoo.com

    Looking forward to hear from you soon.

    Thank you!

  19. Hi! Your story is very inspirational. My partner and I are also planning to have a family in Bangkok but we don’t know any reliable ivf center. Can you send us the details of your clinic and doctor.
    We would really appreciate it.

    You can email us at hot_chick_ako@yahoo.com

    1. It is difficult these days, but I still have lots of contacts in Thailand who I can draw on for info. I’ll email you soon. Good luck! X

      1. I see. So does your previous doctor perform ivf or not anymore? If not, do you know any reliable ivf clinic in Bangkok. Thank you!

      2. No he won’t do it. And he won’t allow us to use or move our remaining embryos either ๐Ÿ˜ฆ
        I have one person with a possible contact but no guarantees xxx

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